# I got roped in...



## minicoop1985 (Oct 8, 2014)

to doing weddings and family portraits. Oh boy. I did have fun doing family photos for a friend, but I don't even know where to begin with weddings (thankfully all next year). Anyone have some advice to get excited about these things? I mean I barely know where to start (Google) and kinda dreaded this. Did anyone else dread their entry to weddings and end up enjoying it?


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## Nevermore1 (Oct 8, 2014)

I'm not a pro and the only wedding I've done is my own, I have got to ask - how did you get roped in to doing weddings? 

I'm not sure how much my advice will help but if you've never done group photos I'd say start callong friends and get them together to do mock wedding portriats in different locations with different lighting.  At least that way you'll be able to get an idea as to what poses work and what doesn't work and get some practice in.  Tell them you'll get them lunch or dinner in exchange for their time (even if it's just hitting a local pizza joint).


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## minicoop1985 (Oct 8, 2014)

Hey, that's brilliant! I'll have to work on that.

It was a friend. She wants me to do hers, then referred a friend of hers, then it became a thing.


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## D-B-J (Oct 8, 2014)

The word NO does exist...


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## D-B-J (Oct 8, 2014)

But really. Research wedding photog's. See what you like. Try and emulate it. It worked well "enough" for me


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## pgriz (Oct 8, 2014)

I think Big Mike and Tim had put up some really good threads on doing weddings, but you're gonna have to search for them.


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## sm4him (Oct 8, 2014)

I've always insisted there was NO way I'd shoot a wedding. Uh-uh, not gonna happen.  Didn't really even want to do portrait sessions. But then this year, I made learning to get more comfortable with portraits a goal, and in the course of learning started to actually enjoy it.

But weddings? NO, thank you. I even refused a co-worker who pretty much begged me and told me that it was a VERY small, very casual thing.  I just couldn't imagine enjoying it, and therefore I couldn't imagine doing a decent job of it.
Too much pressure, too many once-in-a-lifetime (or, at the most, 3 or 4 times in a lifetime...lol) shots to try to remember to get.

Then my niece got married. I didn't offer, even when they asked for suggestions for a photographer. They hired a college kid, who is a friend of my son's. Fine. Good. GREAT, in fact. I could just be a proud aunt.
Then I got to the wedding and decided to do a few shots, Just for FUN. No pressure. And only after asking THE photographer if he would mind; he welcomed it, after seeing my gear (since he was shooting with a D5100 and a kit lens...). I stayed WAY out of his way though, and just took a few shots.

Problem is--I enjoyed it tremendously.

Then I went to another niece's wedding last weekend. I took my gear again, but this time the photographer seemed a bit more professional AND had an assistant, so I didn't even ask. Just left my gear in my bag and tried to enjoy the wedding.
And found myself CONSTANTLY thinking, "oh, I hope the photographers got that shot!," "oh no, I don't see the photographers and that would be a GREAT shot." But I stuck to my guns and didn't snap one picture.

Then found out the next day that my cousin, the mother of the bride (yeah, okay it's not technically my "niece", it's complicated!) asks if by chance I took any pictures, and says her biggest regret of the night was not asking my sister and I to at least do some candids.

Now I find myself, just a LITTLE bit, kinda wanting to do a wedding. A *small* one. A really, REALLY casual one. One where NOBODY really cares what the pictures are like, as long as they are a step above instagram.

Because I really kinda liked the small taste of it I've had. And that scares the bejeebus out of me. 

I like Nevermore's idea of doing some mock wedding stuff. Also, get on pinterest and see if you can find some photos that start to inspire you.

Or just call the people, tell them you don't know what in the hades you were thinking, and there is NO WAY you're doing a wedding.


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## twocolor (Oct 8, 2014)

This is the very last year I will be shooting weddings, and I am SOOO excited!  I charge more than most in my area (because I truly didn't want a lot of wedding clients), but even the ones that hire me expect you to bend over backwards, spend all day shooting, you're battling all the Uncle Bob's with cameras (in one case the father of the groom followed me around all day challenging me.  'What makes YOUR camera so much better than mine?'  I finally answered 'The person behind it'.) it just isn't worth the stress.  I just don't enjoy them anymore.  Good luck!


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## minicoop1985 (Oct 8, 2014)

Thanks for the advice everyone. I've been looking through some photos from my own wedding, and will be peeking around the Interwebs for ideas. I'm having a hard time being excited for it, but if it helps me get to do what I really do enjoy (taking photos), then I suppose.


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## D-B-J (Oct 8, 2014)

I think the quote is "shoot what you can't help to shoot. Those will be your best photographers." Or something like that. Give it a shot, and if you hate it, well at least you tried. You might surprise yourself.


Sent from my iPod touch using Tapatalk


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## tirediron (Oct 9, 2014)

The key to wedding shooting is planning!  Know what's going to happen and when it's supposed to happen (and then be prepared to wait 30 minutes).  Know where people are going to enter from and depart from, where the register will be signed, when & where the boquet toss will occur, know when the cake will be cut, if there are any must have shots of guests/relatives (98 year old Uncle Bill who's travelled from Upper Gumboot Junction), know how you're going to get venue to venue, where you're going to park, etc, etc.  I don't do many weddings, but when I do, I walk the whole thing out in advance.  Meet with the officiant at the church to find out where you can stand and what you can and cannot do (I remember one memorable meeting where the Rector told me, "Oh, we don't allow any photography during the ceremony!").  That was a fun conversation with the client who had simply assumed I could do whatever I wanted.  Book twice as much time for formals as you think you'll need (and be prepared to get about a 1/4 of that).  Make friends with one of the key player (Maid/Matron of honour usually) who can tell you who's who, what's what, and why we're delayed, as well as help you herd the cats. 

Good luck!


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## Nevermore1 (Oct 9, 2014)

As tirediron said, be sure to find out if there are any special guests that the couple wants photos of and ask either them or the wedding planner for a schedule of events in advance of the date.  For my wedding I made sure my photographer got a shot of me with my God Father as he had flown in from Thailand the night before and was flying back out the next morning.  I wasn't expecting him to make the trip (30+ hour flight) but when he did I wanted to make sure to get some pics with him and would have been upset if I hadn't.  I also had some friends who celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary the same day and I asked for the photographer to try to get a good shot of them which I gave to the couple.  I think that most couples if they are asked what shots  they don't want missed they usually tend to think of moments in the day (kiss, cake cutting, etc) as opposed to any special guests that may be attending.


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## 12sndsgood (Oct 9, 2014)

I was in your situation, said i'd never do them and got roped in by a friend. same as you I luckily had  months time to prepare. Preparing is your friend, the more your setup going in the less things will bother you when they go wrong ( and they will) I just studied what I could, did some good reading, planned my day out. Got with the couple early so I could take control of the planning of there day, they took it as me helping them out with there wedding but in reality it was me taking control of the timing of the day so I could get them the photos they needed. this can be huge in your day. we talked about family member.  oh these family members always create drama and fights but they have to be in photos? okay we schedule them last so they are around everyone the least amount of times.  things like that during planning can help minimize issues and help put the day in your favor, if there is something your worried about photo wise, start working on it. needing equipment, get it and have your backups handy in case something goes down.

I never thought id like wedding because you have to get the shot. but found I enjoyed the work of getting the shot, of making it thru the day, of taking care of what you need to get done.

And sorry if my post was all over the place. been in the hospital all week with no sleep so im a little loopy lol.


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## Derrel (Oct 9, 2014)

Weddings are people playing dress-up. People going to a wedding EXPECT that they will be in pictures. There's often alcohol or prescription drugs being used behind the scenes for nerve-steadying by many people involved in the event (I am being serious here, not making light of people). The women look as pretty as they can possibly look, and they have made their men-folk look as good as is possible. So, look at the wedding as a field day. Pretty women, men who have shaved and have on clean good clothes and are resigned to the fact that they WILL BE photographed!

Again....people playing dress-up,and expecting to BE photographed. You really need to look at it that way. Much of "good wedding photography" is, really, honestly, the people in their finery. Imagine how many wedding photos would look if everybody were in their after-work hair,clothes,and makeup. Seriously. Next time you look at a wedding set, imagine the women in sweatpants, hair in pony-tails, bare-footed, makeup off. Imagine all the men in sports T-shirts and baggy NBA-style shorts. Separating the subject matter from "the photography" is kind of a fun sport when you look at wedding photographers' portfolios.


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## JacaRanda (Oct 9, 2014)

minicoop1985 said:


> to doing weddings and family portraits. Oh boy. I did have fun doing family photos for a friend, but I don't even know where to begin with weddings (thankfully all next year). Anyone have some advice to get excited about these things? I mean I barely know where to start (Google) and kinda dreaded this. Did anyone else dread their entry to weddings and end up enjoying it?



I started by saying " Will shoot your wedding strictly as a guest with a fat camera and juicy lenses" sortof.  That was enough to get me excited to do it, and enough for her to decide to elope in Vegas.


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## minicoop1985 (Oct 9, 2014)

Awesome advice, guys. Luckily, since she's a friend, I can talk with her pretty openly and she's open to my ideas, etc. I'll have 

My fear is being that guy who shoots weddings just for money and not because it's something they enjoy. You know the one. Doesn't really care, jaded, just there to collect a paycheck.

Would being a second shooter for someone be worth it? I mean I REALLY want this to come out well. I don't want to mess up one of the most important days of someone's life.


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## gsgary (Oct 9, 2014)

Shoot it with one of your film cameras


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## minicoop1985 (Oct 9, 2014)

Gary, the Mamiya will be coming along because that's a thing I do.


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## 12sndsgood (Oct 9, 2014)

minicoop1985 said:


> Awesome advice, guys. Luckily, since she's a friend, I can talk with her pretty openly and she's open to my ideas, etc. I'll have
> 
> My fear is being that guy who shoots weddings just for money and not because it's something they enjoy. You know the one. Doesn't really care, jaded, just there to collect a paycheck.
> 
> Would being a second shooter for someone be worth it? I mean I REALLY want this to come out well. I don't want to mess up one of the most important days of someone's life.




you will know after one wedding most likely whether you want to do it again or not. its usualy a love it or hate it thing, if your not going in all the way with them why bother, it will show in your work


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## Mr. Innuendo (Oct 14, 2014)

If you got "roped in", the you're not in control of your business. If you're not in control of your business, you shouldn't be in business. Don't fret, though, because if you're not in control of your business, you won't be in business for long.


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## minicoop1985 (Oct 14, 2014)

Mr. Innuendo said:


> If you got "roped in", the you're not in control of your business. If you're not in control of your business, you shouldn't be in business. Don't fret, though, because if you're not in control of your business, you won't be in business for long.



I dunno. Yes, I got roped into weddings by a friend, but that doesn't mean I am going to stop focusing on what I actually know how to do, enjoy most (most people look at me and say that's the most boring thing I've ever heard, but dammit I like it), and what makes me enough money to live on. It also doesn't mean I'm going to fail miserably-if I just specialized in weddings and portraits, I'd fail pretty fast. There's a LOT of competition around here in that.


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## MichaelHenson (Oct 14, 2014)

I would definitely work like MAD to find a wedding photographer or two that would let me come second shoot for them a few times.

Other than that, I'd spend a TON of time working on portraits, lighting, and posing with as many people as I could find to stand still long enough for me to take pictures. And, I'd do what everyone else on here said too...I'd also find someone that could help me out that day...an assistant to carry stuff, corral people, adjust lights, etc.

But that's just me...Best of luck!


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