# my first wedding



## JimmyJaceyMom (May 22, 2007)

was awful.  
bad thing #1.  it was supposed to be outdoors and instead the lady that ran the chapel decides it was too windy and we had to do it inside.  Fine, that's ok right?  NO becasue inside is smaller than my bathroom (slight exaggerations) and there is nowhere to go that there arent people in your way THEN she tells me she doesnt want me to use my flash!  Let's see how many great images of a ceremony I can get when I cant get up close and I am not allowed to use my flash.  hmmmm.  Well I used it anyway but I didnt want t o tick er off so I kept it minimal.

bad thing #2.  No one has time to do posed pictures outside they have to get to the park reception right away and the bride's kid is covered in poop so we have to do it without him which leaves the bride in distress.

bad thing #3.  I get to the 'reception'  there are like 20 people just sitting there.  Not doing anything... Most everyone has put on jeans and tshirts and is already half kicked in the ass from the kegs so they are doing NOTHING interesting and no one is interested in getting their picture taken - in other words they were not friendly people!!!  

bad thing #4.  No one likes eachother..  I asked the bride who she would like a picture with, her mother?  She says with her mothe rright behind me.  No.  I dont like my mother - we dont get along.  Okaaay, what about your dad?  nope not him either.  The groom and his parents.  No they dont get along either.  Okay then.

I could go on and on but I won't. Because I dont like to complain and I dont like to make excuses.  I dont know if I would have done better if this had been a more traditional wedding.  And I dont think I will find out. LOL


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## Jim Gratiot (May 23, 2007)

Sorry to hear about it... twenty years from now you'll laugh when you think about it.

In a way, it's a good story for people to hear... wedding photography is NOT easy... and not just from a photographic point of view.  You're dealing with stressed out folks, wedding planners, etc.

Hope your second one is better.  (Don't give up yet!!)


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## RMThompson (May 23, 2007)

Yes, you seem to have hit the motherload of terrible weddings... but PLEASE share a picture or two!


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## JIP (May 23, 2007)

Sounds like you got all the things that can go wrong all together in one wedding.  I looked at your flikr and saw some wedding images they look pretty good.  you should post some from the wedding here.


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## NJMAN (May 23, 2007)

Wow, you really didn't have a good time...Sorry it wasn't a pleasant experience, but what else could you do?  You tried your best and that is all anyone can expect from you.  Ya, it didnt sound like anyone wanted to cooperate or be friendly at all.  Thats too bad.  This sort of reminds me of a wedding about 6 years ago in Las Vegas where I was a groomsman.  No one was covered in poop (good thing!), but there were quite a few snobby and uncooperative people there.  Dont throw in the towel just yet, it HAS to get better than what you went through!


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## dewey (May 23, 2007)

Okay... sorry to hear about the bad time... below is not meant to be critical of you (except for the flash - that's just silly) but to share my experiences with wedding photography over the years:

bad thing 1: You need to plan to be flexible - plans change at weddings all the time.  As for the flash - you rarely will be able to use your flash during an indoor ceremony - even if you can it is in bad taste to do so... it's very distracting.  I'm surprised that you seem to be proud that your ignored the bride's request of no flash.  Why in the world would you do that?  Getting good images when you can't get close up without a flash is what makes a wedding professional... what lens were you using that you had to use a flash? 

bad thing 2: Something to that end happens at every wedding, and the bride is always distressed about something.  A good wedding photographer is also part family mediator.

bad thing 3: Get a long lens and hide in the corner next time... you'll get a few good candids no matter what the crowd. (look for kids, even mean people usually smile around kids)

bad thing 4: Weddings with families who don't get along are a bit annoying, but it's just part of the territory.

Now take what you learned and do it again... even though it went poorly in your eyes it was good experience.


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## RMThompson (May 23, 2007)

I just peeked at your flickr and you SURELY got some good images! I really like "swings" of the kids on the swings!  SO sweet! 

I agree seeing the people in jeans and whatnot is a little frustrating, and if I was getting married I would be ****ED... I don't want my boquet tossing pic to a bunch of people getting ready for a picnic... so a little tip. When something in the picture ruins the "classic" look, a cigarette, a paper napkin, people in jeans, try to desaturate to sepia tone, and see if it helps. It does for me!


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## NJMAN (May 23, 2007)

I just looked at your gallery too, and I think you did a great job!  Not bad at all for your first wedding.  Except for a few pics that need to be cropped a bit, or straightened, and some are underexposed, they are generally good.  You should be very proud of these!


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

I'm not finished editing this one. It needs a lot - I wasn't very close to them and there were a ton of shadows and I had to clone out some limbs of guests that were on either side of them.











Yeah... there's a guy missing. He got up while I was setting this up, looked right at me and then walked away.  
















HAHAHA see how hoppin this wedding was?!?!?!?!?!? Notice the lack of guests around the bouquet toss!





Same here.. you know why? Because there werent any! LOL





Need I say more about the attendants and how much class they had? I'm not classy either but this picture just 'fits' the way the entire wedding went.  





















Okay, I'll admit I do like this one





and this one 





so there's a couple for ya. I did post them in my flickr for the bride to see them. I know I was told this would be a small informal wedding but I just wasnt expecting a Jerry Springer type ordeal where uncle jimjobobfred wouldn't even feel the need to put his teeth in. LOL 

Thanks for the encouragement guys.  You're the best. I reallyl think I will stick with children's portraits and try to improve on those instead of weddings. I actually enjoy taking children's pictures wheras by the time this couple cut the cake I was checking my watch.


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

By the way.  My family has it's own uncle Jimjobobfred, I'm not making fun.  Just trying to convey that it wasn't what I expected.


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

(((((





dewey said:


> bad thing 1: You need to plan to be flexible - plans change at weddings all the time. As for the flash - you rarely will be able to use your flash during an indoor ceremony - even if you can it is in bad taste to do so... it's very distracting. I'm surprised that you seem to be proud that your ignored the bride's request of no flash. Why in the world would you do that? Getting good images when you can't get close up without a flash is what makes a wedding professional... what lens were you using that you had to use a flash? )))
> 
> well no I think I didnt make myself clear... that's what's tough about typing.  It was not the bride's request it was the lady that ran the chapel. And I don't have a fast lens at all so when they said it was to be moved indoors I was like Oh crap.  My lens isn't capable of taking pictures in near dark environments in such a situation.  But when they started the family members were taking pictures with their disposable cameras and using their flashes so I just did it.
> 
> ...


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## mysteryscribe (May 23, 2007)

Wedding from hell, we have all had at least one.

I'm going to come down against most folks here.  You need a good flash and know how to use it to shoot weddings.  That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.  

If they won't let you use flash during the ceremony and I agree it is distracting.  Get a tripod out of the car where you keep all the equipment you didn't think you would need and set up for a few natural light at low shutter speeds.  At that said, my rule is I won't be the first to flash a strobe, nor will I sit back and let someone with a point and shoot have the best picture of the ceremony.

As for the indoors outdoors thing you do the best you can.  As for the lining up for pictures, YOU have to TAKE control period.  It's what your job is.  That said, it is one of the hardest things to learn.  Everybody wants to be loved by everybody else, but sometimes you have to be the drill sargent.

You did well I think.  Don't throw your hands up just use it to learn.  Good to get the wedding from hell out of the way early.


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

mysteryscribe said:


> Wedding from hell, we have all had at least one.
> 
> I'm going to come down against most folks here. You need a good flash and know how to use it to shoot weddings. That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.
> 
> ...


 

Thanks for the advice... I will be learning to use a flash correctly in the near future but not for weddings.  I'm not throwing my hands up in frustration over not having done well, which in my opinion, I did not.  
I'm not assertive enough personality wise to tell people what to do so it's obviously not going to work out for me.
Also I just did not enjoy it.  I don't know if enjoying yourself is a must to you guys but if I am so sick of editing the pictures already and I just want to get it over with, common sense (which really isn't common at all) tells me that I probably shouldn't offer my (dis) services to anyone else.


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## AprilRamone (May 23, 2007)

Awwww...I'm sorry it went badly for you.  But, I think the picture of the guest book being signed with cigarette in hand is really funny

And I think you are smart to pursue something that you enjoy more and not worry about doing weddings.  I LOVE doing children's pictures and even though I want to get better at weddings, I will never give up doing children's portraits.  Focus on what you love and it won't seem so bad  :hugs:


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

AprilRamone said:


> Awwww...I'm sorry it went badly for you. But, I think the picture of the guest book being signed with cigarette in hand is really funny
> 
> And I think you are smart to pursue something that you enjoy more and not worry about doing weddings. I LOVE doing children's pictures and even though I want to get better at weddings, I will never give up doing children's portraits. Focus on what you love and it won't seem so bad :hugs:


 
Yeah that is funny! Kinda why I took it.  
And yes there was a significant difference in how I feel when I take children's photographs than I felt when I was at that wedding.  In fact when I was at the wedidng I kept taking pictures of the kids there.


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## mysteryscribe (May 23, 2007)

Put a little time between you and the wedding from hell before you throw out the baby with the bathwater.  If you still feel the same in a month take if off you list of things to do.  If you find it irresistable try to find someone who knows the business to help you out.

Good luck either way.

ps wedding photography aint rocket science just hard work./... you can do it.


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## oldnavy170 (May 23, 2007)

Well I have to admit that the guy signing the guest book with a pen in one hand and the cigarette in the other actually made me laugh.  I know thats not what you were going for but that is a CLASSIC moment!!!!


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## NJMAN (May 23, 2007)

Thats like something from the 70's when people walked around with cigarettes in public places everywhere and thought nothing of it.  But sheesh, you'd think that a person could detach themselves from a cigarette for a minute or 2 to sign a nice guest book at somebody's wedding.  Its kind of a special moment to sign a guest book, or at least thats what some people think.  

NJ


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

haha!  ok I wasnt going to go there but that isnt the strangest image of the day.  I htink this one tops them all.







Looks like a wedding setting to me whatdya think?  LOL these two were at it all day!!!


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## NJMAN (May 23, 2007)

Are you kidding me???? They are like sucking face in broad daylight and pretty much groping each other, and in front of young kids yet. Yep, this one takes the cake (no pun intended on the wedding cake) for strangest picture at a wedding. :thumbup: 

Maybe this should be a challenge on another post!!  "STRANGEST PICTURE TAKEN AT A WEDDING." I have one from my latest wedding thats pretty good, and I will share it.  

NJ


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 23, 2007)

Hey that sounds like a plan.  I dont know if this one would win but it sure gave me the creeps.  That kid wasnt even theirs.  If I was his mother I would be like - ew! get away from there!  lol


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## txshutterbug (May 24, 2007)

I am so sorry for your experience, but I must say you have started out my day with a big chuckle!!  Thanks for being willing to share!  Look on the bright side, it's unlikely to ever get worse than that!


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## mysteryscribe (May 25, 2007)

Wedding and reception in the same room.... guest tap the keg before the ceremony.  Take the plastic cups of beer to their seats for the service.  Look up from the group shots to see guys pushing and shoving over my camera case.  

That was the best of the memories that day.   they happen to us all.


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## JimmyJaceyMom (May 25, 2007)

mysteryscribe said:


> Wedding and reception in the same room.... guest tap the keg before the ceremony. Take the plastic cups of beer to their seats for the service. Look up from the group shots to see guys pushing and shoving over my camera case.
> 
> That was the best of the memories that day. they happen to us all.


 

See and you continued to do weddings after that huh?  lol You must have liked them.  I would be happy to never take another wedding photo in my lifetime!!!! 
I'm not kidding you.  I usually break out that camera at least once a day and do you know that it was four whole days before I took another picture?  I had post traumatic stress disorder with my camera!  haha.


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## JIP (May 26, 2007)

JimmyJaceyMom said:


> Thanks for the advice... I will be learning to use a flash correctly in the near future but not for weddings. I'm not throwing my hands up in frustration over not having done well, which in my opinion, I did not.
> I'm not assertive enough personality wise to tell people what to do so it's obviously not going to work out for me.
> Also I just did not enjoy it. I don't know if enjoying yourself is a must to you guys but if I am so sick of editing the pictures already and I just want to get it over with, common sense (which really isn't common at all) tells me that I probably shouldn't offer my (dis) services to anyone else.


I think the assertiveness thing might be a problem when shooting weddings.  As was previously said you need to be the drill seargent you need to take charge at a wedding and if that doesn't work you need to remind the B+G that they paid you alot of money for you to be there and if they want good pictures of their wedding they need to tell their friends to cooperate.  I hope you can get at least one good wedding under your belt before you decide to throw in the towel.  I love shootong weddings but I guess thst is a personal thing and some people hate it but don't judge shooting weddings on one bad one.


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## mysteryscribe (May 26, 2007)

Well thank god the barn dance wedding wasn't my first, but on my first which was almost forty years ago, I was shooting flash bulbs. It was a total nightmare. And I think the going rate then was two hundred bucks. I actually like the work pretty well and love the ooohs and ahhhhhhh at the proof show. 

I just hate the actual business part of it. Getting the customers and the constant mental gymnastics of: is my price to high, is my price too low. It's a nightmare but the shooting is usually okay for me. 

My second wife gave me the advice that guided me through my years of wedding photography. She said, "Did you ever notice that a Micky D burger tastes the same in maine as in alabama. It is also the same on Friday as it was on Monday."

"Yeah,"

"So you should find out what worked in you last wedding and keep that, then find out what didn't and fix that. When you get it so that everything works, stop screwing around with it."

In other words trying to figure out every problem as if it were a new one is crazy and only leads to mistakes. Create your system and work your system. It worked for me all those years, and with several variations for the better, it is working for my son in law now. He is digital I am still film.


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## vandecarr (May 27, 2007)

HOLY COW!!!!!

This is like a Saturday Night Live skit!

The good thing is now you have a story that will be very entertaining to a lot of people and images to prove your story and make them laugh even more.

There is absolutely NOTHING you could have done about it. If they all hate one another then invited all the people they hate to the wedding it was a planned disaster from the start.

One tip for a fast lense. I would HIGHLY reccomend a canon 50mm f1/8 prime.

It is a kick butt lens and I use it about 90% of the time and it is right around $70, you absolutely can not beat it.

If it makes youfeel any better, I absolutely HATE weddings and stopped doing them all together.


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