# Writing "About Me" sections are the WORST.



## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

I want to re-do the "about me" section of my website, but I'm sitting here staring at a blank page, because I don't know where to begin.

My last one was way to long-winded and stupid and I'm over it.

I can't find a happy medium between just listing my name, number and email, and actually being slightly personable. 

Pfffffffft.

I have *always* been terrible about writing bios. It's literally the WORST.

/mini vent


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## snowbear (Jan 24, 2015)

"Hot chick with a cool hubby & photo passion."


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## snerd (Jan 24, 2015)

Tell ya what I'm gonna do! Today only! Cause I like ya!!


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## Vtec44 (Jan 24, 2015)

Two ways of doing this.  You can keep it strictly professional or more personal and relatable. Oh, a little bit of humble brag is okay.  

Okay may be 3 ways to do it...


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

Vtec44 said:


> Two ways of doing this.  You can keep it strictly professional or more personal and relatable. Oh, a little bit of humble brag is okay.
> 
> Okay may be 3 ways to do it...



That's the line I'm having a hard time towing, haha.

My last "about me" page was a little too much... cheese, I think.

The one I'm writing now feels a little *too*... profesh?

I'm having a hard time writing one that sounds mostly professional, but with a little bit of pep.


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

Also, there really isn't anything for me to "humble brag" about. LOL


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## Vtec44 (Jan 24, 2015)

e.rose said:


> [
> 
> That's the line I'm having a hard time towing, haha.
> 
> ...



IMHO, it depends on the clients that you want to attract and and maybe just be yourself.  In my personal experience, people want to know about the artist behind the camera as much as the quality result.  Photography style can be similar but the photographer is always different.  You are unique and people want to hire a unique artist.


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

Anyone wanna proof-read this for me?

I'm sure I have 50 billion grammatical errors in this... And I'd like to have at least 45 billion less by the time I hit "publish".


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## Vtec44 (Jan 24, 2015)

e.rose said:


> I'm sure I have 50 billion grammatical errors in this... And I'd like to have at least 45 billion less by the time I hit "publish".



My wife proof reads mine!!


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

Vtec44 said:


> e.rose said:
> 
> 
> > I'm sure I have 50 billion grammatical errors in this... And I'd like to have at least 45 billion less by the time I hit "publish".
> ...



My husband spells "kidding", "cidding" by accident on occasion and thinks, "It ain't" is an acceptable part of a phrase.

The hell I'm having him proof-read anything.


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## Vtec44 (Jan 24, 2015)

Well, it's time to turn on spell check in Microsoft Word.


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

1. I use PAGES. I'm a Mac. Screw that Microsoft Word bidnezz... 

2. It's not the SPELLING I'm worried about. I have a spell-checker. It's the run-on sentences and over-abundance of comma's that I'm known for that I need checked. Hahaha.


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## Vtec44 (Jan 24, 2015)

Oh ****.  May God be with you sista! LOL


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## tirediron (Jan 24, 2015)

I'll give it a read through if you want Rose.


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

tirediron said:


> I'll give it a read through if you want Rose.



I'll just... leave this right here  :

Emily Rose McGonigle is a photographer based in Nashville, TN, specializing in fashion senior portrait photography and modern portraiture.

She strives to provide her clients with a unique and fun experience, whether that be on-location or in the studio. In order to accomplish this, she will meet with you before your session to get to know you and discuss the vision for your photo shoot. She also works with a team of professionals, including a hair and makeup artist for senior and modern portrait sessions, to make sure you look and feel your best!

Emily is a fun-loving individual with a love for music ranging from, The Mars Volta, Mute Math, Colony House, James Bay, and some Pop guilty pleasures as well.

She enjoys TV and movie comedies, well-written suspense stories, and has a slight (read: major) addiction to social media.

If you'd like to meet with Emily about a session, feel free to contact her in one of the following ways:


Email: *[email here]*
Phone: 555-555-5555
Contact Page *[Click Here]*
Carrier Pigeon _(Please allow 24 hours for response using this method. If no response is received within 24 hours, please try again using one of the other methods listed above.)_


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## pgriz (Jan 24, 2015)

I'd change from third person to first person.  Get the conversation going with YOU.


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## tirediron (Jan 24, 2015)

> I'm Emily, a, professional photographer living and working in Nashville.  I specialize in fashion, senior portrait photography and modern portraiture.
> 
> My goal is to provide my clients with a unique and enjoyable experience, whether on-location or in my studio.  The experience starts with our pre-session consultation where we get to know each other, and I can get a sense of your tastes and style, allowing me to create images which showcase your unique personality.  I work with a team of professionals including a hair and makeup artist for to make sure you look and feel your best!
> 
> ...



 I think it's important to strike a balance between being the person that your senior clients can relate to and the person their parents (who are probably paying for the session) can relate to.  I don't really think your taste in music matters, in fact that could turn off someone who is a fan of Bach or Brahms because they will make assumptions about you based on your musical taste (WE know those assumptions are true, but they don't have to!  ).  I also think it helps to make a more personal connection by referring to yourself in the first-person.  It's one thing if you're the head of a big company, but you're not (yet).


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

I'm pretty much set on what I'm going to say. I just need grammatical things corrected, if there are any.

If my musical tastes and slight personality/humor things I've thrown out there turn people off to working with me, then they weren't my ideal client anyway.

I want to work with relaxed, laid-back and fun people. Not someone who is going to be turned off by the fact that I like Mute Math instead of Brahms. 

My last "about me" page was worse. I listed TV shows like Family Guy and Archer and the like, haha. But every client I got was exactly the type of fun and laid back client I wanted. So they either read it and thought, "how fun!" or it was so long they didn't even bother to read it down that far anyway, hahaha.


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## e.rose (Jan 24, 2015)

I will, however, take into consideration and sit on whether or not I want to flip it to first person vs. third person.


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## snerd (Jan 25, 2015)

I just moved or removed a couple of commas, and added a "to" in front of discuss. If we can get Lenny to proof my proof, you're gold.

Emily Rose McGonigle is a photographer based in Nashville, TN, specializing in fashion senior portrait photography and modern portraiture.

She strives to provide her clients with a unique and fun experience, whether that be on-location or in the studio. In order to accomplish this, she will meet with you before your session to get to know you and to discuss the vision for your photo shoot. She also works with a team of professionals, including a hair and makeup artist for senior and modern portrait sessions, to make sure you look and feel your best!

Emily is a fun-loving individual with a love for music ranging from The Mars Volta, Mute Math, Colony House, James Bay and some Pop guilty pleasures as well.

She enjoys TV and movie comedies, well-written suspense stories and has a slight (read: major) addiction to social media.

If you'd like to meet with Emily about a session, feel free to contact her in one of the following ways:

  Email: [email here]
  Phone: 555-555-5555
  Contact Page [Click Here]
  Carrier Pigeon (Please allow 24 hours for response using this method. If no response is received within 24 hours, please try again using one of the other methods listed above.)


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## e.rose (Jan 25, 2015)

snerd said:


> I just moved or removed a couple of commas, and added a "to" in front of discuss. If we can get Lenny to proof my proof, you're gold.
> 
> Emily Rose McGonigle is a photographer based in Nashville, TN, specializing in fashion senior portrait photography and modern portraiture.
> 
> ...



Thanks!


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## Ray Hines (Jan 25, 2015)

It looks ok to me, but I'd drop the reference to specific bands. I'm into a bit of rock music myself, and my son runs a music mag, and I've never heard of any of them. I'd stick with just using the term Rock Music, bands can go out of vogue very easily. What would your clients have thought if you'd had The Lost Prophets listed there? Good luck with it, I've tried and failed myself


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## pgriz (Jan 25, 2015)

"About Me" is a marketing document.  It needs to speak to the customers you want, and to scare off the customers you don't want.  I think you've already said as much in the earlier posts.   From the perspective of the customers who are hiring you (the parents of the people you photograph, first, and the people themselves a close second), they are looking for a professional who can deliver some interesting, attractive and (perhaps) edgy images that are not standard poses.  It's probably important to them that you figure out their vision (or at least hopes) for the images.  There may be some tension between what the parents and the people themselves will want to portray, which will need to be taken into account.  Your portfolio already has a certain "look" to it, which they will see either on your web site or when you meet with them.  So...

You're not exactly a newbie.  You've been doing this for a while and have a portfolio to show for it.  That should be mentioned in the first paragraph where you're setting the stage and giving your credentials.  Key concerns are usually - do I even want to talk to this person?  And the answer they should get is:  Yes, she's local, she's experienced, and she's done this kind of stuff lots of times with very good results.

Mentioning the process you go through in the second paragraph is good, but I'd consider rewriting it a little to be more chronological.   Because at this point, the buying decision is "How is she going to make this work for us?"  Letting them visualize the process a little helps in letting them know that you know what you're doing.

Next question may be "But how will I know my daughter/son/spouse/etc. will really look their best?"  and the answer may be to give them a sense of your personality and your approach to doing the shoots.  This section should include stuff that would allow people to feel that you're "one of them", so that you'll "get" what they want without a lot of effort on their part.

And now the hook - what can you do that they can't get anywhere else.  This is where testimonials from previous clients are really important, not necessarily for testimonial quotes, but for the things they say they enjoyed and appreciated the most from your sessions.  Because those bennies (the positive experience) is the real product that you're selling.   The pictures will be a confirmation of the positive experience. 

Hope this isn't too long.  Emily, your talent at shooting is obvious.  Your prospective customers need to get that feeling as well.


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## e.rose (Jan 25, 2015)

Ray Hines said:


> It looks ok to me, but I'd drop the reference to specific bands. I'm into a bit of rock music myself, and my son runs a music mag, and I've never heard of any of them. I'd stick with just using the term Rock Music, bands can go out of vogue very easily. What would your clients have thought if you'd had The Lost Prophets listed there? Good luck with it, I've tried and failed myself



I'm not worried about whether or not the bands I like are bands anyone has ever heard of, or if they're "in vogue". The Mars Volta isn't even a band anymore, Colony House is a band local to Nashville and one of my all-time favorite bands, Mute Math is not as mainstream as some other bands, but they have been on soundtracks and are more mainstream than some other bands I really like.

I wrote down some of the bands that I like, because that's part of who I am. Music plays a very large role in my life, and it's important to me, and helps showcase my personality. "Rock music" is too generalize. Am I talked about Nickelback, buttock? Led Zeppelin, classic rock? Menomena, indie rock?

I'm comfortable listing them out. I've had more bands listed out in my previous, way-to-long-to-get-through "about me page". This is simply a much more condensed version. 

And for the record, I DID like Lost Prophets. In like high school. What happened with them is sh*tty, but I still listen to that album I have of theirs from time to time, because it doesn't change the fact that it was a huge part of my senior year of high school. 

The bands I have listed aren't controversial in any way. If someone is refusing to book me based on the fact that they haven't heard of the bands I like, or because they don't like one of them... that's not my client, and therefore is not a loss for me.

I've also noticed that my idea senior client tends to have the same musical tastes as I do, so... even better for me.

I realize the parents are the ones paying for the service, but most of my clients have come from the *students* finding me either through their friends or a search and liking what I have to say, and how I work and photograph, and taking it back to their parents. Any of the *parents* that have found me before their kid, have come to me saying, "I think my kid would love to work with you because of XYZ", so they've always taken into consideration what their *kid* wants when booking me.

I *am* trying to find a nice balance here, but the fact of the matter is, I'm not worried about cutting off a certain demographic, if that's the case, because not everyone is my ideal client. I'm not aiming towards the masses. I'm aiming towards a specific type of person. 

I don't want to work with the parents who are forcing their kid into something static or something they don't want to do. That's not fun for me, or the student. So if listing a few bands keeps the boring ones from contacting me... great. That's exactly what I want.  



pgriz said:


> You're not exactly a newbie.  You've been doing this for a while and have a portfolio to show for it.  That should be mentioned in the first paragraph where you're setting the stage and giving your credentials.



I didn't give credentials because I don't have any. I never went to school for photography, never went to a workshop, never won an award, never apprenticed or studied with anyone personally... there's really nothing there to talk about. Maybe I might mention that I've been shooting for 5 years, but in some people's minds that's not even that long of a time, so I prefer to just avoid it all together. My portfolio speaks for itself. If they're concerned with whether or not I have a degree or how many years I've been shooting (because I know people who have been shooting for 20 years and are worse than I was in my first year... and I was pretty bad...), then they're not the person I want to book. They're in the same vein as the "price shoppers" as far as I'm concerned, haha.



pgriz said:


> Mentioning the process you go through in the second paragraph is good, but I'd consider rewriting it a little to be more chronological.   Because at this point, the buying decision is "How is she going to make this work for us?"  Letting them visualize the process a little helps in letting them know that you know what you're doing.
> 
> Next question may be "But how will I know my daughter/son/spouse/etc. will really look their best?"  and the answer may be to give them a sense of your personality and your approach to doing the shoots.  This section should include stuff that would allow people to feel that you're "one of them", so that you'll "get" what they want without a lot of effort on their part.



This is a very valid point... But it's SO extensively covered that it has it's own section on my site. I have "About Photographer", "About Senior Portraits", and "About Portraits" as all separate sections on my website (The last two need re-working and updating, so don't go bother peeking at those just yet because they will be changing. I just don't have enough time to rework the whole site all at once, so I'm doing it a bit at a time over the next week or so, haha). 

But the long and the short of it is, yes, I go over my process, chronologically, in detail on the page specific to senior portraits.

I just want my "about me" page to be a small peek into my thought process. 



pgriz said:


> And now the hook - what can you do that they can't get anywhere else.  This is where testimonials from previous clients are really important, not necessarily for testimonial quotes, but for the things they say they enjoyed and appreciated the most from your sessions.  Because those bennies (the positive experience) is the real product that you're selling.   The pictures will be a confirmation of the positive experience.



Way ahead of you. 

I have testimonials from clients that I need to upload to my site (which will also be it's own page), and I am about to send out surveys to my clients this past year as well.



pgriz said:


> Hope this isn't too long.  Emily, your talent at shooting is obvious.  Your prospective customers need to get that feeling as well.



Not too long, no. Sorry I broke it up the way I did. You just had a lot of good things to say that I wanted to address specifically. 

Also thank you for the compliment.


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## pgriz (Jan 25, 2015)

One of the keys of successful marketing and sales is to go back to those clients you've had who you consider to be your "ideal" market and really go through the buying decision with them, in terms of what attracted them to you, what concerns did they have, how did they overcome those concerns, what aspects were they pleasantly surprised about...  etc.   It's one thing to think you know why they chose you over others, it's another thing to go through their buying experience with them.  Perhaps it will confirm what you already know.  But it may also surprise you.  I know when I go through this process myself, I'm often surprised at the little things (in my mind) that were really big things for them, and vise versa.  This process of going back to your best and ideal customers and making sure you really understand their decision-making process is something that I think is key.    I have a feeling that you're already doing that, but to me you can never do too much of this.


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## Ray Hines (Jan 26, 2015)

Emily

If music is important to you then keep it in, and best of luck with the work.

Ray


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## ronlane (Jan 26, 2015)

@e.rose, how come you don't answer the phone when I call you?? Also, I can't understand what you are saying on the voicemail. And why are you charging me $9.95 a minute?


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## minicoop1985 (Jan 26, 2015)

If it helps, take a look at my "About Me" section on my Zenfolio. It was written by an English teacher (my aunt) for me. Just whatever you do, make sure what you say really does represent you and your interests, particularly what you want to photograph.


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## 407370 (Jan 26, 2015)

I just figured out that "senior portrait" is referring to school pupils and not old people.

Go Me.............. I will be speaking americanese soon


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## Robin Usagani (Jan 26, 2015)

Let me write your about me.  I am your stalker remember?  I practically know everything about you.


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## Robin Usagani (Jan 26, 2015)

If your link is "About Me", then you need to write it as first person.  If your link is "Who is Emily" or "About the Artist" or "Info", then writing it as third person is acceptable.  I personally like writing it as first person.  Makes it more personal.  Plus it is really a one person operation.  I think third person is better if your company has several photographers.


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## e.rose (Jan 26, 2015)

Robin Usagani said:


> Let me write your about me.  I am your stalker remember?  I practically know everything about you.



No.


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## pgriz (Jan 26, 2015)

Well, that was short and sweet.  

Guess that Emily isn't one of those wishy-washy indecisive people.


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## photoguy99 (Jan 27, 2015)

I dunno if you're mid-edits or what, but the current text reads:



> I strives to provide my clients with a unique and fun experience, whether that be on-location or in the studio. In order to accomplish this, I will meet with you before your session to get to know you and to discuss the vision for your photo shoot. I also works with a team of professionals, including a hair and makeup artist for senior and modern portrait sessions, to make sure you look and feel your best!



Your subject verb agreement ain't happenin', unless you going for a gollum thing. Nasty hobbitses steals my Precious yess they does. Ruin their senior sessionses I will, yess, my preciousssss.


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## e.rose (Jan 27, 2015)

photoguy99 said:


> I dunno if you're mid-edits or what, but the current text reads:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



HAHAHAHAHA. 

Awesome, thanks for pointing that out.


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## Mr. Innuendo (Jan 30, 2015)

e.rose said:


> Emily Rose McGonigle is a photographer based in Nashville, TN, specializing in fashion senior portrait photography and modern portraiture.



What's "modern portraiture"?

If I'm looking for a photographer to do some portraits, you've lost me, because I don't know what that is.



> Emily is a fun-loving individual with a love for music ranging from, The Mars Volta, Mute Math, Colony House, James Bay, and some Pop guilty pleasures as well.



If I'm looking to hire you to shoot portraits, it really doesn't matter to me what music you like. I'm 52 years old and have no idea who any of those bands are. What you need to be concerned with is that I've got money to spend, but nothing about the music you like makes me want to spend it with you.



> She enjoys TV and movie comedies, well-written suspense stories, and has a slight (read: major) addiction to social media.



Again, as a potential client, I could care less about what television shows you like, or what books you like to read. You're not hooking me and, more importantly, you're not hooking my wallet.



> Carrier Pigeon _(Please allow 24 hours for response using this method. If no response is received within 24 hours, please try again using one of the other methods listed above.)_



I understand not wanting to come across as completely stoic, but I don't think this is even mildly professional.

Your "about me" page is a sales pitch. Approach it as such.


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## e.rose (Jan 30, 2015)

Mr. Innuendo said:


> You're not hooking me and, more importantly, you're not hooking my wallet.



That's okay, because as a 52 year old male, you are not my clientele base.

If my previous, long as hell, super-convoluted, "About Me" got me the clients I wanted, this one will do just as fine, if not better. 

I'm not worried about the content at this point. Just the grammar and the spelling.



Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk


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## imagemaker46 (Jan 30, 2015)

e.rose said:


> I want to re-do the "about me" section of my website, but I'm sitting here staring at a blank page, because I don't know where to begin.
> 
> My last one was way to long-winded and stupid and I'm over it.
> 
> ...


It's always difficult talking about or writing about yourself, usually better off having someone else or a few other people that know you  put words down and then cut and paste the comments.  I used what I have done in the past as a photographer and then had a proof reader go through it and make it sound like I knew what I was doing.


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## Vtec44 (Jan 30, 2015)

e.rose said:


> That's okay, because as a 52 year old male, you are not my clientele base.



I LOL'ed.    It's great that you're going after a specific demographic.  You're a specialist and not a generalist.  IMHO, you can command a higher price point that way.


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## Mr. Innuendo (Jan 30, 2015)

e.rose said:


> Mr. Innuendo said:
> 
> 
> > You're not hooking me and, more importantly, you're not hooking my wallet.
> ...



Really? Who is?

You've just exposed a pretty major flaw in your approach.

Your "client base" shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same books you do, and it shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same television shows you do. It should be comprised of people who have the money to spend on a photographer.

You say you do senior portraits. Who do you think is paying for that? Nine time outta' ten it's not the senior but, rather, the senior's parents. You need to cater to them as much as you need to cater to the student.

You say you do "modern portraiture". Well, if I'm the guy who's writing the check for his kid's senior portrait, then you need to ensure that I know what that is. How does "modern portraiture" differ from any other kind of portraiture? Why do the books you read make a difference to the parent (again, the one who's likely paying you)?


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## Vtec44 (Jan 30, 2015)

Mr. Innuendo said:


> Your "client base" shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same books you do, and it shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same television shows you do. It should be comprised of people who have the money to spend on a photographer.



That's one approach to it, but Emily has another approach.  She's trying to relate to the clients which can work really well.  I speak from personal experience since I have the same approach and it is working out very well for me.


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## e.rose (Jan 30, 2015)

Vtec44 said:


> Mr. Innuendo said:
> 
> 
> > Your "client base" shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same books you do, and it shouldn't be comprised of people who like the same television shows you do. It should be comprised of people who have the money to spend on a photographer.
> ...



And also works well for me.

And "modern portraits" does not refer to the senior sessions. This are an entirely different genre and target clientele. Women, specifically. And all that is gone into detail on a separate page, just like the senior portrait sessions themselves are spelled out on another page.

So thank you for your concern and input, but I don't intend on changing anything at this point.


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## pixmedic (Jan 30, 2015)

im just disappointed there was no Modest Mouse in your music list on your page...


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## e.rose (Jan 30, 2015)

pixmedic said:


> im just disappointed there was no Modest Mouse in your music list on your page...


Haha, I like them, there just not one of my FAVORITES. 


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk


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