# Wedding photography problems



## heidirenee (Dec 2, 2013)

Hi all,

I am a first time poster and very interested in wedding photographers views and advice on the following points.
I'm a professional photographer, and my specialty has been weddings for the past two years. 

Let's begin the long post!

I  am not a 'candid' photographer - i direct and pose, and acknowledge the  amount of time i need for my shots by delivering a timeline and list of  requirements to a wedding client before their big day. I stress the  point that while plans can change on a wedding day, this is my timeline  to get my required shots - if it can't be met i'll obviously still work  my best, but coverage may be compromised. 

HOWEVER - surely i am not  the only one that runs into trouble during almost every wedding? I shot a  wedding yesterday which seen me receive a text from the brides sister  at 10:30pm the evening of the wedding telling me to arrive half an hour  late to the grooms (it ended up being less than 30 minutes shooting time  for the grooms coverage all up) and also to drive around the videographer for the day as he didn't have a car.

I  had met with these people three times to discuss my work, contracts and  timelines. I personally visited their house. In the end i was dealing  with about three people - the bride and her two sisters. 

*How do you  deal when there's too many 'chiefs' at a wedding?* When it ends up being  not only cousin Tim involved but also sister Betty and aunty Joan?
My  timeline was not followed, and around 20 minutes was wasted  photographing the bridesmaids receiving their gifts, simply because i  was told to do that. While they have no right to complain when they see  the images that there's a lack of bridal portraiture (one of the many  things covered in my contract is no guarantee of shots) i feel that they  will as they won't remember their complete lack of disrespect to me on  the day of the wedding.
*
How do you cement your style to a client that  they too can get a great day of wedding photography coverage, when you  show them your most successful and 'on time' wedding? Does it matter how  many examples of your work you show them, because at the end of the day  it's really up to them to decide if they're still in bed when you rock  up to their house on the day of the wedding? And even though you enter a  legal agreement with the bride and groom, how do you deal with in laws  telling you what photos to take?* While contracts cover your ass from  further legal action because some people choose not to follow direction,  it's incredibly frustrating to see people doubting you and suggesting  how to take photos on the day of the wedding - even suggesting what  times you should go to each location.

I even had a relative of the  bride tell me to 'lift up my game' as i missed the father putting his  daughter INTO a car before leaving for the ceremony held half an hour  away, although i stressed on the three consult sessions that i would be  leaving before them and waiting for them at the ceremony to get  father/daughter car shots. And guess what. The father never went with  the bride to the ceremony. They were in separate cars and arrived at  separate times. I guess this comes back to the many 'chiefs' at a  wedding - *do you simply be polite and smile when a distant relative is  telling you how to do your job, when they were never involved in the  consult sessions?*

*For the photographers who've been doing this for decades - did you find peoples trust grew the longer you worked for? Is it time that cements peoples trust in you?*

I look forward to hearing your responses!


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## Steve5D (Dec 2, 2013)

Allow me to preface this by saying that I am not a wedding photographer. The reasons I am not include many of the things you're asking about.

But, I don't think one needs to be wedding photographer to comment, so here it goes:

The way I see it, the photographer at the wedding works for the bride and groom. Period. What the bride and groom want is paramount, and supercedes (by a wide margin) anything that anyone else wants you to do.

Now, it wouldn't be unreasonable to think that the bride and groom would be able to handle every issue which comes up, simply because, well, it's their wedding, and they get pulled in a dozen different directions. In such a case, I would think the Best Man would/could/should be designated as the "go to" guy when problems arise. If guests are getting in the way of you doing the job the bride and groom hired you to do, there should be someone who can help you mitigate those problems. I do not think that it's necessarily your place to confront guests. I do, however, believe you should ignore them (unless they're trying to tell you that your hair's on fire, etc. Ya' might wanna' pay heed to those comments).

It's pretty simple: You have a client, and that client is not on the guest list.

Your client wrote the guest list...


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## Big Mike (Dec 2, 2013)

Welcome to the forum.

I'm not a full time wedding photographer, but I've been shooting them for 8 years or so.  
What you describe doesn't surprise me at all.  While maybe a little worse than average, that kind of thing happens all the time.  Weddings are busy days and whenever things get delayed, it will inevitably eat into your designated photography time.  
That is why I always ask for way more time than I actually think I'll need.  

As a wedding photographer, I think that part of our job is to cover and document the events of the day (whatever they may be) and the other part is to create some formal shots to document the people (B&G, family etc.)  Of course, we usually want to do this in as beautiful and artistic was as possible....and of course, every photographer's style is different.  Some might lean more toward the journalistic coverage and other might lean more toward formal photos.  

It is a good fit when your style matches what the clients want...and how they choose to spend their day.  But that doesn't always happen.  In your example, I'm getting the impression that you wanted to do more formal/posed shots, and they were just too busy being 'in the moment' of their big day...and so they wanted/needed you to just capture the events as they happen.  
So even though you met with them and discussed this beforehand...it just wasn't the best fit. 
Don't beat yourself up, it happens.  Just do the best you can with the circumstances you have to work with.  

We get many wedding photography questions around here...people asking if they have the right gear, what they should charge, how to shoot in this situation or that....and I always have a little chuckle to myself.  Because those things are fairly easy, the hard part is managing people and their expectations, dealing with situations that you know will lead to you delivering less than your best work...and most importantly, adapting to whatever you have to, and doing your best all the while.  

One way to 'hopefully' avoid those types of situations, is to choose your clients more carefully.  Of course, you can't always tell how the day will be, from the initial meeting...so this can be a pretty hard thing to do.  One of the best ways, is to raise your prices so high, that most of your clients are the type of people who are willing to pay that much because they absolutely love what you do.  Those type of people, are usually more willing to follow your lead during the day.  They will make photography a priority during the day.  

Of course, it's not just that easy.  Your work has to justify the higher price and you have to market to, or attract the type of people who can afford it and are willing to pay it.  

I sometimes work with a photographer friend of mine.  He's really, really good and part of that, is that his clients always seem to make time for him/us during the day.  And yes, his price is very high.


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## The_Traveler (Dec 2, 2013)

Don't do weddings, but do shoot events.

In my contract there is a person designated who is responsible for getting me to all the *have-to* shots - big contributors, board members, etc.
During the event, I take my directions from that person.
If anyone else tells me differently, I refer them to that person with a smile.


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## gsgary (Dec 2, 2013)

First off you should send the videographer a bill for $200 for taxi fares


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## jowensphoto (Dec 2, 2013)

Of every wedding I've shot, as an assistant, second or lead - not a one has been perfectly on time. I call it "wedding time" - everything runs about 30-45 minutes late. 


My  most recent wedding, I had to deal with an overly extroverted grandmother and fauxtographer cousin (who was in the bridal party). Kindly remind them that you are there as a paid professional and that you are fully capable of performing your job on your own. Even a simple, "No, this is fine," can go a long way when they start in on their "suggestions."


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## heidirenee (Dec 2, 2013)

Thank you everybody for your input! 
I have thought about extending my time frame. I usually spend an hour 10 mins with the groom, and 2 hours with the bride. However my mum, (my helper) says it probably won't do much with making people be on time. If they're not dressed by 10am, why will they be dressed at 9am?
I never understood that if you pay a trade professional like a plumber for a job, you don't give them advice on how to 'do it'. However when you spend thousands on a wedding photographer, people think it's their god given right to make suggestions and give direction when you're working. Sometimes it's like 'why am i even here, if i simply can't be trusted to work and deliver my style that i was hired for?'
I am definitely cautious with the clients i choose to shoot. If someones just after a cheap deal and really hasn't seen my work, then they don't know my style and that i pose shots. However like it's been said you never can tell until a wedding day!


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## jowensphoto (Dec 2, 2013)

> I never understood that if you pay a trade professional like a plumber for a job, you don't give them advice on how to 'do it'. However when you spend thousands on a wedding photographer, people think it's their god given right to make suggestions and give direction when you're working. Sometimes it's like 'why am i even here, if i simply can't be trusted to work and deliver my style that i was hired for?'




True, in most industries. But these days, every one and their mother with a P&S is a professional photographer.


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## CCericola (Dec 3, 2013)

You know may favorite weddings are ones with wedding planners. They are the go to person and I just go with the flow. The planner knows my style, time needed, etc... and the planner and their assistants get to stress about everything.


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## heidirenee (Dec 3, 2013)

CCericola said:


> You know may favorite weddings are ones with wedding planners. They are the go to person and I just go with the flow. The planner knows my style, time needed, etc... and the planner and their assistants get to stress about everything.



I could only dream about having a bride with a wedding planner, most bride's don't event want to hire a photographer :/


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## Big Mike (Dec 4, 2013)

CCericola said:


> You know may favorite weddings are ones with wedding planners. They are the go to person and I just go with the flow. The planner knows my style, time needed, etc... and the planner and their assistants get to stress about everything.


I agree about wedding planners...it's so much easier when there is (a good) one on board.  In some situations, we have to act as planners because nobody else has any real experience about what to do during a wedding.  



heidirenee said:


> I could only dream about having a bride with a wedding planner, most bride's don't event want to hire a photographer :/


Seriously, if you can figure out a way to raise your prices (and still get clients), problems like this will mostly go away.


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## reberra (Aug 16, 2016)

Its true, if you get clients after raise your photography prices then this type of problems will never come seriously.


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## AceCo55 (Aug 16, 2016)

reberra said:


> Its true, if you get clients after raise your photography prices then this type of problems will never come seriously.



Welcome to the forum.
You might want to check the dates on a thread.
This one is two and a half years old.


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## table1349 (Aug 16, 2016)

reberra said:


> Its true, if you get clients after raise your photography prices then this type of problems will never come seriously.


After 3 years do you really think the OP cares???


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## robbins.photo (Aug 16, 2016)

gryphonslair99 said:


> reberra said:
> 
> 
> > Its true, if you get clients after raise your photography prices then this type of problems will never come seriously.
> ...



Lighten up folks.  So somebody resurrected a zombie thread.  It's not like a kitten died.


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## tirediron (Aug 16, 2016)

robbins.photo said:


> gryphonslair99 said:
> 
> 
> > reberra said:
> ...


Ummmmm....


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## robbins.photo (Aug 16, 2016)

tirediron said:


> Ummmmm....



Ahh.. crap.  Ok, well, sorry little kitty.  Sigh.  Carry on folks...


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## table1349 (Aug 16, 2016)

5 count them 5 kittens died.


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