# recent TFP



## Double H (Nov 19, 2007)

I am building up my portfolio in the portrait realm. Here are a few from a trade-for-photos shoot with a budding young model. C/C expected and appreciated

1.






2.





3.





4.





5.


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## Ajay (Nov 19, 2007)

I think your photos are great. Awesome lighting, although the last one seems to have a slight halo effect around her hat.  Also, you seem to do a lot of retouching so the only thing that stuck out to me in that aspect is the piece of hair in front of her right eye in #4.  Maybe you can PS it out.
She is a beautiful model but her expressions look very forced and unnatural.


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## Alpha (Nov 19, 2007)

I'm gonna give a proper critique for what these are.

You did a good job with the high-key lighting.

In the first shot, the angle is off/the pose is a little too strained, and she's doing the almost-smile.

I don't think she quite pulled off the look in the second, though I know what she was going for. It turned out to be a little too deer-in-headlights.

The third is really nice. Well done. My only critique, and this is kind of nit-picking, is that hair is really important. You should be able to shoot high key and still preserve a lot of detail in the hair if you're shooting that close. 

The fourth just didn't turn out as far as I'm concerned. Her facial expression is just totally off. As an aside, I think the hoodie shot is ridiculously played out (not that you should refuse to shoot it if she requests one as part of the TFP session). 

The fifth, I have a number of problems with. First, the feet turned in and hands on hips thing is a glamour pose. It just doesn't work in jeans and a cable-knit, not to mention the hat. The light at camera left is overpowered, and washed out all the detail in her face. I think it could have been half a stop darker. Next, if you're gonna do high-key, keep it consistent across the subject. The hat is distractingly dark.


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## Double H (Nov 20, 2007)

Thanks for the critique. Much appreciated. She, and I are both new to modeling, so we will take the direction well. I felt the same way about her expressions. It almost like she tried too hard. 

I had a difficult time getting my light to bounce where I wanted it to bounce. I will probably be shooting her again, so I am looking forward to fixing the issues seen here.  Thanks folks!


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## subimatt (Nov 20, 2007)

I like them overall, I think they are a bit to soft for my taste, but thats just me. I like #1 and #3 the best, I find her teeth is #4 a bit distracting however.


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## Big Mike (Nov 20, 2007)

There are a lot of good things going on here...and some things that leave room for improvement.

As mentioned, her expressions (especially her smile) just aren't doing it for me.  It's sort of a half way smile that only brings out the lines around her mouth.  I know it's not a fair assessment, but it makes her look like a stereotypical air-head.  I think the 2nd shot is by far, her best...even if she didn't nail the look that you were going for.

As for the lighting...it's pretty good but some of the issues have been mentioned.

The softness & haziness does bother me a little.


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## newrmdmike (Nov 20, 2007)

shes cute. - good choice 

in 4 i would like to see this with white backdrop, or light contrasting color from the jacket.  something about 4 doesn't at all fit with the rest.

some are a tad to soft for me, a trick i use is:

2 blurred layers one set to lighten one to darken, then group them together, add a mask to them, and tone down the softness around the eyes and lips, or wherever you want.  if you want i can send you the action, just pm me.


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## newrmdmike (Nov 20, 2007)

and max gave a good critique.


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## dpolston (Nov 20, 2007)

Max... tell me again what kind of photographer you are? I am beginning to think you talk a great game but don't actually play. I think you have the tendency to crucify some of these guys that are asking for help that are learning. It might be time to put up or shut up. I _have _been in this business taking those kinds of shots and although I have some critiques myself, I am not going to pick him apart. 

Double H: I will have to say, keep shooting and playing around with lighting settings. One of the ways I try them out is (this is almost too stupid to post) I place a volleyball on the top of a tripod and shoot that. Dial the lighting up and down, shoot each light a lot! I once did 100 shots with just a hair light, just to see where it all fit in the "overall picture". 

I will have to tell you too that the model is very attractive but she (she, not necessarily you) has to work on her smile. If she wants the work on her end as much as you do on your end, it needs to be more natural and that is something that you might not be able to control for her. And btw: blonds are hard to shoot sometimes in high key lighting on white, it does blow out their hair colors.

Good work dude!


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## wildmaven (Nov 20, 2007)

dpolston said:


> I will have to tell you too that the model is very attractive but she (she, not necessarily you) has to work on her smile.


 
I agree. She does what a lot of young girls do (do they learn this in school??) and that's to stick her tongue forward when smiling, which totally changes the shape of the smile. She should practice her smile in front of a mirror until her muscles hurt and then for another hour after that, LOL. She also needs to watch her abdomen. There are plenty of models who have that little pooch of belly fat like in #2, but they know how to keep it hidden.  

For some reason, the tilted head shots make her eyes look uneven. Is one eye higher than the other?

Did you use a fan to blow her hair? It's something I want to try. How far away did you have it from her?

I love the lighting in the first one. It's very soft and beautiful.


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## Double H (Nov 20, 2007)

wildmaven said:


> Did you use a fan to blow her hair? It's something I want to try. How far away did you have it from her?



Again, thanks everyone for some great direction. Her mom was holding a fan right off her belly-button facing up. The model's eyes got very watery, however. A more powerful fan, placed farther away should help with that.

The volleyball is a great suggestion. I have used beauty-heads from the cosmetology shop across the hall from my shop. They have great hair, and usually I can shoot a blonde, a brunette, a readhead, or even a white-head. Great for playing with lighting. It's funny, though, when a cute model is the subject, I sometimes forget all that I've learned.


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## Alpha (Nov 20, 2007)

dpolston said:


> Max... tell me again what kind of photographer you are?


You know, it's this kind of arrogance that really gets my goat. If you've been in the business a long time then you know as well as I do that there are more than enough so-called pros who produce a lot of mediocre work. The fact that they've been in the industry for a long time neither disqualifies me from giving a critique, nor proves on face that they know what they're talking about. If you've got years of advice to give then give it. But don't bust my balls because you're getting letters in the mail from AARP and I'm just getting into the game.



> I am beginning to think you talk a great game but don't actually play. I think you have the tendency to crucify some of these guys that are asking for help that are learning. It might be time to put up or shut up. I _have _been in this business taking those kinds of shots and although I have some critiques myself, I am not going to pick him apart.



My critique was thorough and reasonable. I'm not sure what you're talking about. I wasn't aiming to crucify him. Yes, I outlined some of the problems in his shots. That's part of what critiques are. I also gave some substantive advice, which you didn't care to pay attention to. If you think it would benefit the OP to argue with my critique, then by all means...

And no, I'm not talking out my ass. I do TFP just like everyone else. What do I have to post photos of my Broncolors or something? Lay off.


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## Iron Flatline (Nov 20, 2007)

Max: On a completely unrelated note, I just tried to send you a PM, but your Inbox is full. Send me a PM with an email address where I can ping you (or delete some old PMs). 

Thanks.


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## Alpha (Nov 20, 2007)

Iron Flatline said:


> Max: On a completely unrelated note, I just tried to send you a PM, but your Inbox is full. Send me a PM with an email address where I can ping you (or delete some old PMs).
> 
> Thanks.



Sorry. I've taken care of it now. Check your PM's.


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## zendianah (Nov 20, 2007)

Double H said:


> I am building up my portfolio in the portrait realm. Here are a few from a trade-for-photos shoot with a budding young model. C/C expected and appreciated
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## craig (Nov 21, 2007)

I hate seeing teeth. That is just my personal view. 

She is cute and the light is good. I think you have to be more creative if you want the work to get noticed.

Love & Bass

P.S
I have been trying to ignore the third grade banter and this is not the only post I found it. Please, please, please keep personal shout outs restricted to PM.


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## dpolston (Nov 21, 2007)

I reckon an apology is in order.

"Max, please accept my most humble apologies for my harsh criticism."

I still believe that some of the posts you've written here (in general) are harsh, overly technical and are written way above the understanding of the people posting. But, in my defense, I have seen several post for those asking for examples of your work and perhaps by seeing some, we would take your posts more seriously as "first hand knowledge" and not something pulled from the internet.

I did not post this in a PM because I do offer a sincere apology and I wanted everyone to know that my comments were uncalled for.

David


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## Double H (Nov 21, 2007)

Critique is why I posted, critique is what I will take from this. Thanks to all who offerred an objective view. I can take it after 13 years in graphic-design and another six in teaching.


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